Archive

Archive for December, 2007

When it all goes wrong…

December 8th, 2007

This is a chastening post. A blog goes quiet, and then a sudden, final post explaining that the femdom relationship has broken up.

I wonder how common this is?

I wonder how many of the blog that start full of excitement and enthusiasm and abruptly end are little virtual graveyards of attempts to build a femdom relationship? Their lack of updates a mute testimony to human dynamics and the fact that an unconventional power exchange is too much for some people.

Something to think about.

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Blogging Honest Power

December 7th, 2007

Here’s an interesting new blog: Honest Power. The author is a submissive guy who is trying to understand, or maybe explore, the role of power in human relationships.

The most recent post really caught my attention, wherein he looks at the links between childhood bullying and submissive tendencies:

I can only speak for myself. I was the victim of bullying until late in high school and, true to form, I discovered many years later an intense desire to submit to women sexually. I even married something of a former popular “mean girl” years before I really noticed my sexually submissive nature. Lucky for me she was more popular than mean.

Wow. That could very well have been me writing…

Linky Linky, submissive blogging , , , ,

Yes, Ma’am

December 7th, 2007

Well, this looks like a fun read, doesn’t it?

Oh, and there’s an earlier volume, too. And here’s the editor reading from it:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E-hXK5a1ig&rel=1]

That’s one Christmas present for my wife sorted out…

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Dominant Icon: Katie Derham

December 5th, 2007

Katie Derham in LeatherAh, isn’t it lovely when the fashion quirks associated with dominant women make their way into the mainstream?

The Daily Mail gets all hot and bothered about presenter Katie Derham dressed in leather. And who can blame them?

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Flirting with Dominance

December 2nd, 2007

One of the elements of my submissive nature I struggle to understand the most is my desire for my mistress to be flirting with, dancing with, making out with other men. This isn’t a threesome thing - I have no strong feelings one way or another about whether I need to be there or not. And I’m certainly not interested in any interaction with the other man involved.

Bizarrely, of all places, I found a powerful description of the basic impulse at work here in a vanilla blog; Susan Senator’s family blog. In a piece called Flirting with Disaster she describes how she finds herself flirting with another man at dinner, how she tells her husband about it and how she knows this will change their relationship from that point forwards.

This passage caught some of what this is all about:

Snuggling with him on the couch, I left nothing out, so that he would know he could always trust me, even if I flirted more (and I knew I would). This was no guilty confession, however; it was about connection and, ultimately, seduction. At one point, I saw something — anger, maybe, or jealousy — darken his expression, so I said quickly, “You have to understand: This is not about him. Let’s just use it, OK?” I smiled coquettishly. He got it.

This fantasy is about two things. Firstly, it’s about enjoying the female power of my mistress. It’s the joy of her experiencing her sexuality, her attraction to others, and the power she holds in their attraction to her. It’s affirming her as a sexual being outwith the confines of the relationship; someone worth desiring; someone worth serving.

But it’s also about our relationship. It’s about sharing something. It’s about the submission of granting her this right, outside the normal boundaries of a relationship, while asking nothing similar for myself. It’s about submission gifted and dominance joyfully received.

That’s what it’s about.

Picture by Paul Bence

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Does the Internet shape Submissives?

December 2nd, 2007

Sometimes (just sometimes) I wonder if the internet wasn’t the worst thing to happen to yer average submissive guy on the street.

Do the fetishes and forms of femdom that dominate (haha) the internet discourse represent the mainstream of the kink? Or do they determine it by shaping young submissives’ fantasies as they read about other people’s turn-ons?

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